(An oldie but a goodie from publisher emeritus Bill Cooke from 2017.)
Been a while since I’ve unloaded on you my collection of classic newspaper headlines. We know headlines can be hilarious. Sometimes it’s even intentional.
Jay Nordlinger, managing editor of The National Review, says his readers keep him abreast of headline gems which he shares in his column. Examples: When a woman from Call, a small town in Texas, married a young minister, the paper offered: Preacher weds Call girl
Normal and Oblong are Illinois towns. This headline was well celebrated:
Normal man marries Oblong woman Nordlinger also had a note from a reader in High Point, N.C., who informed him that High Point is half way between Honeymoon and Climax. And the map doesn’t lie.
—bc—
The late Dr. Martin L. “Red” Gibson, UT-Austin journalism professor, left us way too early, a cancer victim. He had a marvelous sense of humor and a slide show of actual headlines which he presented at press gatherings. The following are from a 1991 South Texas Press Association convention: First was a slide of a fullpage feature on a second-generation farmer. A huge photo showed the farmer plowing the old way, behind a mule. The head: Following in his father’s footsteps
From a business page story about yet another bankruptcy:
Bra firm is flat busted
I dedicate this next one to the fine folks at our local
family-owned funeral home: Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan
This was likely written under deadline pressure. We presume New Hampshire wasn’t blown away: Three states hit by blizzard; 1 missing
When a town’s new sewer plant was completed: New sewer system ready; deposits being accepted
Sometimes, headlines tell a different story than was intended: Youth born in U.S. in Polish uniform
Had to happen sooner or later on a sports page, given all the pro sports franchise- hopping: Tampa may stay in Florida
Ralph Boston was a track great, of course, but the next head explains why they changed the name of an event: Boston broad jumps 27 feet
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